Dmitry Khrustalev was born on February 20, 1979, in Leningrad. From childhood, he was engaged in ballroom dancing. After finishing school, he entered the Saint Petersburg State Agrarian University in the town of Pushkin. At the university, he became interested in playing KVN. He transferred to the Faculty of Economics at the State University of Aerospace Instrumentation and graduated with a degree in "manager of science and education." Since 1998, he performed for the KVN team "Saint Petersburg Team," and was its captain. As part of the team, he became the holder of the Moscow Cup 1998, a finalist of the Major League 1999, a holder of the "Small KiViN" at the festival Singing KiViN 2000, and vice-champion of the Major League 2002.

In 2003, as part of the team "USSR Team," he won the Summer KVN Cup. He gained fame thanks to his parodies of Vladimir Putin. After KVN, Dmitry Khrustalev disappeared from television screens for several years. In 2007, he became a resident of the Comedy Club program in a duo with Viktor Vasilyev. From 2008, he appeared in the program Comedy Woman. In 2013, he became co-host with Ivan Urgant on the program "Evening Urgant" on Channel One. In April 2014, he became the host of the new show "Leningrad Stand-up Club" on the STS channel. From October 2014 to January 2015, together with Viktor Vasilyev, he hosted the parody show "Theater of Variety," then joined the jury of the show "Dance" on Channel One.